There are many myths about Fibromyalgia (FM) and CFS/ME. However, I feel the most hurtful myth is the belief that FM and CFS/ME patients are "lazy" or that we "just don't want to work". I've heard this myth repeated over and over the last 31 years I've been sick with both illnesses. This kind of thinking ruins marriages, strains relationships, and destroys what self esteem we FM & CFS/ME patients have left.

I had my own successful, thriving business that I was forced to sell because of my FM and CFS/ME. I spent the next 5 years trying to find any type of job that I could handle, without any success. In the end I was forced to apply for Social Security disability, losing what little self esteem I had left.

In the eleven years since I created FM/CFS/ME RESOURCES, I've met hundreds of men and women in the same situation, or worse. All of them yearning for the life they can no longer live, and trying desperately to keep up as they circle the financial drain. All the while being seen as "lazy" or "useless" because they're unable to hold down a job.

People don't believe in our pain and fatigue because they can't see it. I used to tell my friends that I wished I had something like cancer or AIDS - something people understood and believed in - rather than having an illness that was unknown and invisible.

Even in the medical community there are people who think those of us with FM or CFS/ME are crazy or that our pain and suffering is all in our heads. They don't realize that there is a mountain of quality scientific research showing dysfunction and abnormalities in multiple systems of our bodies such as:

• central nervous system
• autonomic nervous system
• immune system and endocrine (hormonal) system

We know that we can have any combination of the following abnormalities:

• Neurotransmitter dysregulation (low serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine, high glutamate)


• Abnormal blood-flow patters in the brain


• High activity levels in areas of the brain that perceive pain


• Chronically active immune systems, with elevated cytokines, natural killer cells, RNase L and T cells


• Low levels of stress hormones like cortisol and dysfunction in the stress system


• Unrefreshing sleep


• Impaired working memory and other cognitive dysfunction

When it comes to diagnostics, they need to realize that neurological illnesses are especially hard to diagnose. In order to identify infectious agents in the blood, doctors have to know what to look for. How many viruses and bacteria are undiscovered? How many known ones work in ways we don't fully understand? In addition, many of the tests that do clearly and consistently show abnormalities in studies aren't used in doctors' offices because they're too expensive or the necessary equipment is too scarce.

Lazy? Hardly, for FM and CFS/ME patients to function at all with these things going on takes determination beyond what our critics will ever understand. Anyone who's watched one of us push ourselves on a good day - only to crash for two weeks - should be able to see the drive that enables us just to keep going. It's unfortunate that some people are just blind to reason and punish us for their own shortcomings.

There will always be skeptics who seem to cling to their skepticism no matter what, and this myth is not one that's likely to die soon. Hopefully, the growing body of evidence will make it harder for them to dismiss us as malingerers and will wake them up to just how hard we have to work for every single thing we do.